Madeleine Black has experienced more in her life than most ever will — or would ever want to. Most people who have gone down a similar road have ended up either dead, in mental wards, homeless, addicted to drugs, or in jail. Few have walked away from such carnage with her quiet dignity and led a life that is, by many standards, enviable.
Madeleine was gang raped when she was 13 years old. She was consequently raped 3 more times before the age of 18. One might wonder how such things could happen and potentially make judgements about such people and what they must have done to bring on such events. In a matter of a few, short chapters, the reader will see how a slippery slope can be created from the horrible actions of just one night.
The events of that first rape were so traumatic, it took Madeleine many years and a lot of hard work to uncover the memories of that attack. She, like so many others who have been raped or violently attacked, suffered from PTSD and numerous phobias and at times debilitating psychological challenges. As those memories bubbled up, she questioned their veracity, questioned her own mind. Could she believe such things? Would she make up such things? All the while, she was doing her best to exact what she called her “best revenge” plan on those who attacked her: leading a good, productive, happy life. But the road to living such a life was long and painful.
So how does one emerge from such depths? And can others do it as well? Madeleine tells her story in vivid, candid detail. Her words are simple and straight. Her story is accessible and relatable, even to those who have not suffered such hardships. That’s because her message is about how a person chooses to recover from adversity. It’s not about what knocks a person down, it’s how they get back up.
Forgiveness was the key for Madeleine. That may sound simple or trite, but true forgiveness is neither of those. True forgiveness takes genuine effort. It takes a real desire to understand those who may have done us harm. It takes caring enough about one’s self to take the necessary steps. It’s not about God or religion or faith or prayer. It’s about understanding the human predicament and coming to terms with that. It may take effort, but Madeleine shows us that it’s worth the effort. And really, if we’ve already suffered hardship, what do we have to lose?
In this podcast, Madeleine shares her amazing story of courage and resilience and determination.
We also share some of the ways in which rape victims and other victims of abuse can be helped. It is shocking to see how many violent criminals including rapists are walking free from court after lenient sentences. Britain has the lowest rape conviction rate in Europe. On top of that, there is no proper support system to help or counsel these victims. Counselling is often very expensive and cannot be afforded by most victims. We also discussed if how each coach and mentor out there took it upon themselves to take on board even one victim and help the latter in getting back to life, the world will be a much better place to live in.
Madeleine’s message to everyone is that it’s never too late to find your voice and that you can learn to be okay. She says that it’s not about what knocks a person down but it’s how they get back up. It’s not really what happened to us that’s important. It’s what we do with what happened to us that really matters.
Madeleine can be followed on her various social media accounts
LinkedIn: Madeleine Black
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